tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7544109856327781624.post865555298942338372..comments2023-08-10T02:34:05.834-05:00Comments on Distortion: A Collection of Original Poetry Pieces by Dwayne Williamson: Things You Need to Understand Before You Date MeDwayne Williamsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05500469089498147406noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7544109856327781624.post-88756295099759416952008-05-17T02:07:00.000-05:002008-05-17T02:07:00.000-05:00Things You Need To Accept As You Date Me…The stere...Things You Need To Accept As You Date Me…<BR/><BR/>The stereo in YOUR car is a piece of shit, which means the only thing you control is the silence that ensues if I refrain from reviving your precious audio device. <BR/><BR/>This of course means that I have already broken one of your golden rules, and as I have no vehicle of my own, you also lose any previously mentioned rights to pout…silently or not.<BR/><BR/>You rarely listen to my favorite bands, but you do on occasion make reasonable attempts to find things I can withstand. And it is crucial to point out at this time that your empty threats to bombard my eardrums with ‘brutal death metal’ pass right through me leaving no scars, as I strongly adhere to the adage: "If it ain’t metal, it ain’t music baby!"<BR/><BR/>Let’s move on to the issue of volume control. You apparently like me more than ‘a lot’ because I don’t have to touch the dial, rather you do it on your own in hopes I will repeat myself when I’ve spoken too softly. Might I add that these exchanges occur in the MIDDLE of whatever song happens to be playing while my appendix remains completely intact.<BR/><BR/>So sweetie, it appears that you’ll have to find another reason to boot me from your moving vehicle… Just know that if you do choose to kick me to the curb, I’m taking your electric tape with me.<BR/><BR/>Now, I’m with you on the issue of trust, and while you and I may not have the purest of beginnings I’m willing to leave the life I’ve known to start completely over, and hopefully that’s enough to earn your trust in my feelings for you. <BR/><BR/>Besides, you won’t find me in any clubs without you by my side, and my tits are too fucking small to take shots from but you’re welcome to try. Just make sure you always return the favor and don’t let your ego lead your beard to another girl’s thighs.<BR/><BR/>Speaking of eating…I’ve given up the battle of sharing what I want because you always crave something of a completely opposite ‘food genre,’ and rather than listening to you complain about the distance or watching you poke hopelessly at your plate I find it more appetizing to follow your suggestion…especially if it involves mouthfuls of meat…<BR/><BR/>Which inevitably leads me to your bedroom and the activities we may find ourselves frequently engaged in. While I worship the wicked things you inflict upon my body I also cherish my sleep and thus, if you wake with a wish to rob me of my slumber you’d better be prepared to follow through with enough force to send me blissfully back to unconsciousness.<BR/><BR/>So…by now I hope you’re not rethinking your plans to sweep me off my feet because there’s no other place I’d rather be than by your side, raising my bottle of water to your can of beer in a toast to the most unlikely pair of sexy motherfuckers this world could ever hope to be prepared for.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7544109856327781624.post-30032138114409263262007-12-19T03:09:00.000-06:002007-12-19T03:09:00.000-06:00sing-a-longs are one of my favorite things about g...sing-a-longs are one of my favorite things about going to puroslam. also poking sleeping people.katie cowdenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17570463145187754839noreply@blogger.com